This just in from WFMZ: Allentown has booming Restaurant/Theater District!
The Things you learn watching TV at dinner time. WFMZ had a report starring, (YOU GUESSED IT!) Mayor for Life Ed Pawlowski touting how the center city is being overrun with restaurants.
What WFMZ neglected to show at the 5 PM newscast Tuesday was that just one block north of Hamilton Street, a fight had broken out between 25 to 30 "Yutes" on Linden Street between 7th and 8th Streets. At least 4 suffered knife wounds, and one of those needed emergency surgery at Lehigh valley Cedar Crest.
I guess that is all part of the Cosmopolitan theater district that the Pawloski administration is trying to create. Those kids weren't engaging in a gang related incident. They were really practicing scenes from the movie and Broadway Smash, "West Side Story" and got carried away. I bet if it weren't for the accidental stabbings, WFMZ might have arrived there in time to see a pregnant 15 year old girl do her avant garde rendition of Natalie Wood's role as Maria. God knows they did a great job reenacting the end of the show up to that point, except thank God the kid hasn't died.
Looks like the show is closing after only one off off off off Broadway performance on Linden Street.
You know what that means it is time for.....
Send in the Clowns!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Great satire! I spent all night telling people how absurd this report was, how one-sided - a clear pro-Pawlowski fluff piece by a decidedly pro-Pawlowski 'news' organization. Sure they assassinated me, and Tony, but this was so outrageous it was comical. You captured it perfectly.
ReplyDeleteNo one really cares about the vast amounts of money wasted on the places on Hamilton that have gone under after taking City dollars, or the ones who tried to do it on their own and lost their own dollars. No one cares about the vast number of empty spaces downtown, the inability to curb graffiti. No one cares about the fear factor of downtown. No one cares about the lack of a plan first under Afflerback/Pawlowski, then under Pawlowski/Belletieri and now Afflerback/Duane Tolson. No one has iterated a direction or market that is targeted. It is just let's keep throwing money at the wall, and hope something sticks. Instead, something stinks, but that is only a letter off, so they congratualte each other on getting close.
Cripes, now I am going to have "Maria! I just met a girl named MARIA!" in my head all day.
ReplyDeleteWow, two comments! I am hitting the big time!
ReplyDeleteHey casey, I read your twitter page, maybe you should come to a meeting, it's been awhile.
We always have extra chairs.
Don't hold your breath
ReplyDelete