Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Allentown's new revenue solution: Many meters on every parking spot!


As part of his plan to increase city revenues without raising taxes, Mayor for Life Pawlowski announced today that the city would arbitrarily be placing extra pay meters at every available parking spot.

  In the spirit of legalized gambling though, only one of them will work. But he warned would be parkers that it would be best to put money in each one, to be sure.

  "If one is expired, our meter maids have been instructed to ticket as if all the meters are expired. For example, if your spot has the recommended twelve meters on it, and one expires, you will get twelve tickets. We expect this to help improve our revenue stream immediately."

There is no word yet on rumors that some meters will be modified to also function as slot machines, but the legislation is in a subcommittee at the State Hospital Capitol awaiting approval.

2 comments:

  1. the reality is not that much different than the satire. for instance, in snow storms, when the sidewalks and streets are shoveled on hamilton and 7th by a contractor, the snow is piled around the meters. although almost impossible to access the meters, tickets are still issued.

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  2. I am pissed off that I got a ticket at 8 Am in the morning for parking my car in front of my own parents fucking house. I lent it to them while theirs was getting fixed. Parking authority is most useless fucking bunch on the planet.

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Political correctness isn't my strong suit.